


A very merry Christmas

by murmeltearding



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Breakfast in Bed, Demonic Possession, Domesticity in the Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Drinking, Eventual Smut, Exorcisms, F/M, Falling In Love, Weapons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-18 03:57:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21921394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/murmeltearding/pseuds/murmeltearding
Summary: Daniela is a normal woman living a normal life... until a demon decides she'd make a good vessel.
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 3





	1. She lives a perfectly ordinary life

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as an X-Mas Present for my bestie...  
> Enjoy XOXO

It all had started on a perfectly ordinary day.

I had been going through life as normal, picking up some groceries on my way home from work, chatting with the cute cashier about the newest episode of V-Wars for a couple minutes, carrying my haul to my car, putting it in the trunk; absolutely nothing out of the ordinary, just a normal, boring-ass, Tuesday evening.

I had been looking forward to reading a couple pages of Outlander that night, with a hot cup of tea by my side, in my quiet, comfy, Christmas-y living room, I still remember that vividly.

The parking lot had been dark. The lone street light close by still hadn’t been fixed and the lights from the store had seemed to get swallowed up by the dense fog hovering in the air. I hadn’t been worried though. Nothing bad ever happened in my hometown. In the thirty years I’d been living here, I could remember exactly one time I’d seen a police car with the siren wailing.

I hadn’t been paying attention to my surroundings at all, one earbud in, playing the frozen soundtrack for what felt like the millionth time that day, I had been completely in my own world. And even if I HAD paid attention; back then I wouldn’t have known what to do about a black cloud of smoke moving towards me with a sense of purpose no cloud ought to be able to muster.

I had slammed the trunk lid shut and turned to get in on the driver’s side.

Halfway around the car the black smoke caught up with me. It had engulfed me for a moment, filling my nostrils with the smell of burnt matches, swirled around me as if testing me, tasting me, before it had hesitated in front of my face for a split second as if making up its mind. I had been too confused and surprised to do anything about it and it had driven into me through mouth and nose. It had all been over in about five seconds.


	2. She meets a real life hero

From that point on, nothing had been normal. I had been degraded to a passenger in my own body, able to see and feel and smell everything, but the steering wheel had been pushed out of my reach.

She had introduced herself as Lilim and kindly informed me my body was now hers and to enjoy the ride. She talked to me sometimes, but more often than not, she just did her thing and made me watch. We had killed seven men in the two weeks since she’d taken over, one cat, two dogs and I was pretty sure one little boy. The three latter had been accidents. The first hadn’t.

We hadn’t harmed a single woman or female animal. Lilim didn’t harm women… except for me of course.

She made me wear the most ridiculous outfit, black, skintight leather pants, a bra that made it hard to breathe and a dark red tank top. To pull it all together, she had bought a black leather jacket.

A demon wearing red and black and leather. How original.

 _Shut up_ , she hissed at me. She didn’t like it when I made fun of her inside my head. Well, then she shouldn’t make it so easy. Making fun of her was the only thing keeping me sane.

 _I’m not making it easy!_ she continued.

_Yes you do! The nail salon, the dramatic makeup… was that really necessary?_

_Yes it was! Looks are everything!_ she shot back.

We got out of my battered car, the groceries still in the trunk, slowly rotting away and filling the car with the unmistakable scent of trash, and into another bar. She did this almost every day. Sit down in a bar, wait, watch, and then find a victim. She saw herself as a protector of women, which was why she only took out men she considered bad. What made a man bad in her opinion, I had yet to find out. Her criteria seemed to change with her mood.

A new guy walked in and caught her eye. He was handsome, I had to give her that. Tall, well built, great hair and the saddest, greenest eyes I had ever seen. They were so green, not even the dim lights in the bar could hide them.

He didn’t bother looking around, checking out the other patrons like most other newcomers did, he just sat down on the first free stool he noticed, which happened to be the one next to us.

He ordered whiskey, neat, and didn’t look left or right before he downed it. He was tired. The set of his shoulders, the way he held his head, it was clear even watching him out of the corner of my eye, that he was done with the day, the week, the year. My first instinct was to hug him.

 _Hug him? Don’t you smell the blood?_ Lilim scolded.

_Don’t you see how sad he is? How tired?_

_Even better… makes it easier for us to rid womankind of him._

_I think you got that whole feminism thing wrong…_

She didn’t answer.

It was unfair. She got to read my every thought, while she was able to hide hers if she wanted to.

“Hey handsome…” she said, bending forward the slightest bit to show off our boobs. I had always been naturally skinny, slim, petite, and my boobs matched the rest of my frame. Her technique with taping them up before putting on the much too small bra might be unusual, but it worked. It was uncomfortable, but as much as I hated to admit it, it looked good. For the first time in my life I had an actual cleavage.

Lilim’s victim of the day slowly turned his head and found our cleavage just at his eyelevel. She did this every time. Show off my assets to make men stupid. It was almost scary how easy it was. I really hoped she was working some other kind of mumbo jumbo to aid us. If not, I was losing faith in humanity.

He sat up straighter and forced himself to look us in the eyes. He actually managed, if only for a second, then his eyes were drawn back downwards again.

I felt my face being drawn into a smile. She liked him. She would kill him. I wanted to scream at him, tell him to run away, do something, anything! I couldn’t take another murder.

Instead, I heard us order another round, pointing at her… our future victim’s empty glass.

 _I’ll make it nice and slow this time… I know you like that the most._ she said and I practically felt the grin in her voice.

_Come on! You don’t know if he’s a bad person! What if he was at the blood drive we passed and that’s what you smell!_

She laughed. _Stop lying to yourself! They are all evil!_

I sighed inwardly. Outwardly, my face was drawn into a lascivious smile.

“I like a woman who can hold her liquor,” Green Eyes said. The smile he gave us didn’t actually reach his eyes, but his face still lost some of the heaviness he had been carrying. He looked us up and down once more and turned towards us the tiniest bit. When you’re in control of your own body, you probably noticed little changes in body language on a subconscious level. Now, while I was nothing but a passenger, I got to watch it more consciously. He spread his legs just a little more, subconsciously telling us how huge his dick was or something. I wanted to roll my eyes.

 _I’ll make sure you get to see his privates before I kill him… slowly… peeling his flesh of his bones… it will be glorious!_ Lilim said like I was a little child she had to keep occupied.

What did she get out of all of this?

 _The pleasure of seeing them squirm and cry for their mummies,_ she answered my unasked question.

“I’m Dean,” he said, extending his hand towards us.

“Call me Daniela.” Her using my body was one thing, but her using my identity was something entirely different. If I managed to get out of this alive, and that was a big if, my life was ruined. She had made me a murderess.

Dean didn’t notice my inner turmoil of course. “Daniela,” he repeated. The way my name rolled off his tongue made me want to shiver. “Are you here often?”

“No, I’m just passing through,” I heard my voice say, “and you?”

“Passing through as well.”

The bartender brought our drinks and Dean raised his glass towards us.

“To being in the right place at the right time,” we said and clinked our glass against his. I hated whiskey. It burned the back of my throat and all the way down into my stomach. Lilim didn’t seem bothered by it. She put the glass down and leaned towards him a little more.

He was a nice guy; handsome, funny, a smile that could melt glaciers and just the right amount of mysterious. The sadness in his eyes made me want to hug him continually. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know what it was that had made him so sad.

+++

It didn’t take us long to get him to agree to go to our place. The fact we didn’t have a place didn’t bother Lilim in the slightest. She wouldn’t let him get that far anyways.

Lilim could have downed a bottle of that whiskey and wouldn’t have been bothered; still, she pretended we were drunk, hanging on to him, swaying against him as we lead him towards “our place”. His scent was intoxicating. Leather and motor oil underlined by that raw male smell I liked so much. It would have made my mouth water… and areas farther down as well, if I were in control of my own body.

 _You’re ridiculous,_ she told me in my head. _He is a pig! Like every other man… not even bothering to wash off his day before going out… Disgusting!_

I didn’t say anything back. It wouldn’t change a thing. She knew my every thought, so why bother? And in any case, she was right. Thinking of how good he smelled, knowing full well we would spill his blood in about half a minute. It really was ridiculous of me to notice something like that in this situation. My psychiatrist would have to say a lot about this if I ever got out of this alive.

But what else could I do? I was completely powerless.

It had been infuriating in the beginning, having to watch her do the things she did. I had raged and screamed and pleaded inside my head.

She had never cared. Slowly but surely I had come to accept my fate.

Fate… what a ridiculous concept. How could it be fate to be possessed by a demon? Having to lend my body to an entity that used it for killing people.

This had to stop!

I couldn’t take having to watch another death by my hands.

Dean had his arm around our back almost possessively holding on to us. We acted as if we were thankful for his protection. In truth, Lilim could bench press a monster truck if she wanted to.

Every single dark alley we passed made me want to scream at Dean to run while he still could. I felt our fingers tense in anticipation. She loved doing this.

“I can’t wait,” she suddenly said, turning towards him, kissing him, pushing him backwards.

This was it.

He kissed us back after only a second’s hesitation, absolutely clueless of his impending doom. His lips were strong, yet soft. He knew what he was doing, that much was clear. One moment his lips and tongue dominated ours, the next he held back as we nibbled on his lip. Gently at first, but I knew in a moment she’d bite him for real, drawing first blood.

I couldn’t let this happen again!

I pushed against her with all my willpower, hoping against hope I would be able to bring out a word of warning. Something to let him know of the danger.

 _Stop that!_ she protested as my will clashed against hers. I had tried doing this before. It had never worked, but that didn’t stop me from trying yet again. I pushed against her harder and actually managed to rattle her.

She pulled back.

Dean looked at us, concern taking over his face. “You alright?”

Lilim nodded, our lips pressed together tightly. Did that mean I was making progress?

“Listen… if you changed your mind, it’s okay, I can just take you…”

“Run!” I heard myself say.

“What?”

I wanted to groan. Hadn’t he heard? That one word had been hard enough to get through!

 _Stop doing that, you little bitch!_ Lilim said. She stepped towards him again, pulling him in for another kiss.

Yea, sure, because I’d stop now. I pushed against her again, only two words on my mind. “Run away!”

I had done it again! I wanted to jump with joy.

Her will pushed against mine, forcing me back into the farthest corner of my mind, probably wrapping a chain around me and putting a couple locks on it for good measure, or at least I felt like that was what she was doing.

She kissed him again, pushing him farther into the alley. He didn’t exactly struggle, but he didn’t seem to be that into it any longer.

Run away you fool, I wanted to scream. Save your life!

Nothing came out. Whatever she had done to me, I couldn’t do anything any longer. The thing happened to our eyes again, our vision turning slightly darker for a moment as our eyes turned all black. I had seen it in the mirror a couple of times. Seeing that must make him realize there was something wrong for sure. I just hoped he was a fast runner.

He didn’t run. For some reason, his face took on a look of determination. His eyes narrowed and his jaw muscles worked. He seemed to grow taller. His body language radiated purpose. Purpose, not fear.

He reached into his jacket and pulled out a flask.

What was that stupid man doing? How much drunker did he want to get? Run you idiot!

He unscrewed the lid but didn’t lift the flask to his mouth.

I blinked as the contents splashed on my face. It hurt. Fuck why did it hurt? What did he keep in that flask? Acid?

Lilim took a step backwards. Whatever he had done to us, it scared her. In the two weeks we’d spent with each other, I had never noticed anything even remotely close to fear from her. She knew something I didn’t. And if it scared her, it was probably bad. Fuck.

A flow of Latin started coming from Dean’s mouth before we had recovered from the acid attack and something happened inside my body. No, not in my body, in Lilim.

 _NO!_ she screamed. _Not again!_

A primal scream escaped our mouth, her mouth, my mouth. Some of the words sounded vaguely familiar. “O _mnis satanica potestas… omnis legio diabolica…”_ My Latin was close to nonexistent, but even I could piece together what he was saying. This was an exorcism. They did those on TV all the time. But exorcisms weren’t a real thing… or were they?

Real or not, the exorcism did something to me. Something happened. Nothing pleasant. I felt like bile was rising up my throat. Tears stung behind my eyes, no, not tears… something more substantial. Something wanted to get out of me.

I felt like throwing up and crying and screaming. My mouth opened and a black cloud formed before my eyes. I had to close them. It hurt too much.

Lilim’s wails filled my head, my body, every fiber of my being. My brain felt like it had fallen into a blender. Fuck this hurt!

And then it was over. As sudden as the whole thing had started, it stopped. I closed my mouth and the world toppled over.

Before my knees could hit the floor, Dean caught me.

“Are you alright?” he said.

Shivering and shaking, I clung to him as if my life depended on it, struggling to find purchase on his jacket with numb fingers. He lifted me up in his arms as if I weighed nothing.

I whimpered something unintelligible as he carried me out of the alley. I doubted he could make out my words. I couldn’t even make them out myself.

“It’s alright now. She’s gone,” he said, understanding me anyways. His voice rumbled through his chest as he spoke and it resonated within my own body. His warmth seeped into me, his scent engulfed me. I felt safe. Safe! Lilim was gone.

+++

I woke up an indeterminate amount of time later, lying in a strange bed in a strange room. It was mostly dark, but the streetlight from outside was enough so I could tell I was in a motel room. Someone was snoring in a second bed.

I sat up slowly, looking for the bathroom. Lilim inhabiting my body had made most of my lesser urges disappear. Now they were all back. I had to pee.

“You’re awake,” a male voice said from the darkness.

Startled I grabbed the blanket to my chest as if that would protect me from whoever had spoken.

A shadow got up from a chair in the corner and moved towards me. I moved backwards on the bed until my back touched the headboard, knees pulled up to my chest, blood rushing in my ears.

“It’s okay. You’re save now.” Dean’s face passed through the sheen of light from outside and I relaxed.

He had saved me. I was alright.

Yet, I was in a motel room with him and someone else… not exactly a comfortable situation to wake up to.

“How do you feel?” he continued.

I did a mental check of my body and came up with nothing but a headache… and my still full bladder. “Okay, I think…” I slowly said, hardly able to believe my own words.

“Good, that’s good.” Dean reached my bed and sat down on the edge. His long lashes painted shadows on his cheeks against the dim light. “Do you remember anything?”

I nodded, heroically swallowing down my fear.

“How long was she… how long have you been possessed?”

“Two weeks or so…” I slowly said, rubbing my face.

“She’s done some damage…” Dean said.

I nodded.

“Police is out looking for you.”

I swallowed. Of course they were. We… She had killed seven people, using my body, my identity. She’d never bothered to hide my face. Why would she? I had only been her vessel. She probably hadn’t planned on leaving me alive. The aftermath wasn’t her problem.

Dean remained quiet.

I got up and motioned to what I assumed was the bathroom door. “Bathroom?” I asked.

Dean nodded.

I used the toilet and after a quick glance in the mirror decided to take a shower as well. She’d styled my face and hair, dressed me like a whore… I needed to look like myself again.

“Dean?” I hissed, opening the bathroom door just enough so I could look at him. I was wrapped in a towel and it made me feel awfully vulnerable. I didn’t want to step out in the big room wearing it and nothing else.

Dean had gone back to his chair and startled awake at my call. “Hm?” he made, straightening his back.

“Do you have anything I can wear? I… don’t want to wear her clothes.”

Dean nodded, sniffled and got up. He took a moment to rummage through a duffel bag before he pushed a dark t-shirt in my outstretched hand.

I pulled it over my head, noticing how it smelled a lot like him and finally stepped out of the bathroom. I’d had to pull on my worn panties again. They were dirty but it was better than wearing none. I’d have to get new clothes in the morning.

Crawling back into bed I hesitated. “Dean?”

“Yea?”

“Is this… am I using your bed? Because I can take the chair if you want to… or… we could share…”

“It’s okay,” he said, trying to get comfortable again on the not very comfortable looking chair.

“No it’s not. Come here! There’s enough space! We can put…” I took one of the many pillows and held it up for him to see “… this between us… as a barrier, you know.”

He snorted, slowly getting up from his chair. “You sure?”

I nodded.

The bed moved as he sat on it and pulled off his pants before he made himself comfortable under the blanket. The pillow safely between us I fell asleep quickly.

By morning the pillow was gone. Dean’s arm was tightly wrapped around me from behind, his hips pressed against my ass. He stirred as I moved, but didn’t wake up. He also didn’t let go of me.

Being held by my big and strong savior wasn’t unpleasant in the slightest, so I quickly accepted my fate and allowed myself to relax against him.

There it was again, the little word fate. Was this fate? Was he fate? Was his face burying into my hair at the back of my neck and his hot breath on my skin fate?

Dean pulled me closer and wiggled his loins against me, making it impossible to miss how happy he obviously was to have me next to him, fate or not.

Someone yawning in the room made me tense up. I had forgotten about the sleeping figure in the other bed. I was facing the other direction, towards the bathroom door and Dean was holding on to me so tight, I couldn’t turn around to find out who had made the noise.

I heard the covers rustle and the bed croak as someone got up. Heavy steps moved through the room and suddenly stopped.

I twisted within Dean’s embrace so I could look at the shape that loomed over us. “Morning,” I whispered.

The man cleared his throat and muttered a greeting as well before vanishing into the bathroom with a handful of clothes. He was incredibly tall, very well-muscled and very topless. His pajama pants sat low on his slim hips and covered a nice ass.

Dean gave a grunt behind me when the bathroom door was pushed shut and pulled me closer, grinding his hips against my ass.

And then he froze.

He let go of me and pushed backwards so forcefully, he almost fell off the bed.

“I’m sorry!” he pressed out, jumping to his feet and grabbing a pillow to hide his erection.

I sat up and looked at him. His black t-shirt fit him very well. It ended just below the waistband of his skintight boxers and I saw the muscles in his back and legs tense as he moved through the room, trying to find his clothes. His backside was even nicer than to look at the other guy’s.

Had I fallen into the den of Chippendales sometime yesterday? I pinched my arm to make sure I was awake. It hurt. Okay. This was really happening.

Realizing I had been staring at him, I worked hard (and only partly succeeded) to avert my gaze while he put on pants and a flannel, hiding that glorious view from everyone’s sight. Well no, actually not. No amount of clothes could hide the shape of his body.

When he turned back around towards me, fully clothed, he looked stronger, harder, bigger. Even at a distance, his green eyes seemed to shine in the early morning light that filtered into the room.

The other man coming back out of the bathroom stopped my musings.

“While I’m sleeping in the bed next to you, Dean? Really?”

Dean seemed to need a second to take the other guy’s words in. “Wha… Do you really think I’d… That would be low, even for me, Sammy…”

“When did that ever stop you?”

I slowly got out of bed, wrapped the blanket around myself and moved towards the bathroom. Whatever this was about, I didn’t want to be anywhere close if they started a fight.

“Sam! I didn’t have sex with her!” Dean said.

That stopped me in my tracks. Sam turned around and both men looked at me expectantly.

“I… we… we didn’t,” I stuttered, working hard to stand my ground. Their combined gazes on me made it almost impossible.

Sam turned back to Dean and Dean shot him a triumphant look.

“Care to explain why she’s here then?”

“She’s the one we’ve been hunting for a week. I exorcised the Demon out of her last night and she had nowhere to go. What should I have done?”

That seemed to catch Sam off guard.

“She was scared and alone in the middle of the night,” Dean continued.

Sam slowly turned towards me again, looking me up and down. “Are you hurt?”


	3. She becomes a Hero herself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the smutty part for which I wrote all of the rest   
> lol

One year later

The past year had been a rollercoaster. Nothing could have prepared me for the way my life had turned after meeting Sam and Dean Winchester. The things I’d seen with them, the things I’d learned, the things I’d done. Training with them had made me stronger, faster, braver.

With Lilim not giving a fuck about who saw what she was doing, my identity had been compromised beyond repair. Police was still looking for the woman I’d been. I had changed my name and my looks and the way I dressed, even the way I talked and stayed with Sam and Dean instead. My old life was nothing but a fading memory.

It was the 20th of December. Sam was out on his morning run – admirable, considering it hadn’t stopped snowing since yesterday afternoon – Dean was still in bed. I sat in my favorite chair next to the fake fireplace I had insisted on buying in a stolen flannel, a cup of coffee by my side, reading.

The bunker was Sam and Dean’s homebase. This was where they were the most comfortable and after what I’d been through, I’d quickly found it was one of the few places I felt safe as well.

The book on my lap was one of the many many occult books in their library. On top of my physical training I had learned everything I could about demons in the past months. So much, even Sam and Dean sometimes asked me for advice when they encountered something they weren’t sure about. The focus of my studies had been Lilim, of course.

She had been exorcised, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t be able to come back. After some hesitation, I’d gotten an anti-possession tattoo on my right lower back. It didn’t make it impossible for a demon to possess me but it would make it a lot harder, Sam had explained.

I had put up a some Christmas decorations yesterday evening and the room smelled of forest and cinnamon and warmth… and something else.

I sat up straighter, sniffing the air, looking around.

I knew that smell. Like burnt matches. Sulfur. Ever since the incident, I seemed to be able to pick up the smell from a mile away.

My heartbeat sped up. Putting the book aside, I reached for a sawed off shotgun strapped to the underside of my chair.

Technically, this couldn’t be a demon. Not in the bunker. The wards were supposed to keep everything out and had never failed Sam and Dean so far. But, as I had learned over the course of the past year, there was a first for everything.

I got up, shotgun at the ready, sniffing my way through the room like a bloodhound. For a couple seconds I regretted not having put on any pants when I’d gotten out of bed earlier. Facing off Lilim pantsless wasn’t exactly ideal, but if she was here, I wouldn’t hesitate, pants or not.

I had no plan what I’d actually do to her if – big IF – she was here. I couldn’t kill her with a gun. The ritual to end her took some setup and I couldn’t do it on my own.

Something clattered in the kitchen and I turned left towards it, walking almost soundlessly on bare feet.

Cocking my shotgun at the same moment as stepping into the kitchen, I aimed it at waistlevel and stopped when I found Dean standing before me, staring at me motionlessly. He was in his beloved dressing gown and held a breakfast tray before him.

I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding and let the gun sink to my side.

“What’s wrong?” Dean said, placing the tray back on the table and reaching for the ritual dagger in the knife block.

“Nothing…” I muttered, “just being paranoid…”

He straightened and looked at me, then back at the breakfast tray. “Damn, I’m sorry… I didn’t think…” He apologetically pointed at the matchbook on the kitchen table.

“It’s okay…” I said, putting the shotgun next to the nicely decorated breakfast tray. It held some of Dean’s homemade bagels, a plate with bacon (chances of it being vegan were about 50:50), a bowl of muesli with a couple wrinkled grapes in it, a small glass of orange juice, a lit candle and a flower that had seen better days.

Dean put his arm around me and squeezed my shoulders. Ever since that one night sharing a bed, our relationship had been strictly platonic. We were touching here and there when we were stitching each other up or when Dean carried me out of hairy situations when I’d been hurt, but nothing more than that, never more; which sucked big time since I still remembered the feel of his lips on mine from when Lilim had tried to seduce him.

“Who’s that for?” I asked, escaping from his hug. I loved touching and being touched by him, but it also broke my heart a little each time. Knowing he was there, right next to me, yet not being able to kiss him.

“For you… for bringing some Christmas cheer down here. I know Sam digs that stuff…” He shrugged.

“And I spoiled the surprise. I’m sorry.” I rolled my eyes at my paranoia and grabbed one of the bacon strips. My being able to pick up the smell of sulfur, but not the smell of sizzling bacon said something about my priorities. I wasn’t exactly sure if that was a good or a bad thing.

Dean plucked the bacon from my fingers and stepped between me and the food. “Get back into bed!”

“Are you serious?” I tried reaching around him but he wouldn’t budge.

“Yes. Bed. Now,” he insisted, turning me around and pushing me towards the corridor.

Deciding to humor him, I went into my bedroom and sat down on top of my bed cross legged, waiting for him.

I heard some more clattering and a couple minutes later he appeared in my bedroom door. “You’re supposed to be under the blanket for this,” he said but put the tray on my bed anyways.

“And you’re supposed to…” I lost the ability to form coherent sentences when he sat down on the edge of my bed and left the sentence unfinished. Pushing down the memory of the last time we’d been in bed together, almost a year ago and all the scenarios I’d created inside my head ever since took all of my brainpower.

Dean didn’t say anything either, just watched me intently as if he saw the pictures inside my head. I blushed and picked an imaginary crumb off my bedspread to hide my face. He made me look up at him with a soft finger under my chin.

Our gazes locked. This was happening much too often lately: Our eyes met and the world stopped. Nothing else mattered.

In the safety of the bunker, this was okay, but out in the field… it had almost cost Dean his life once before. This couldn’t keep happening. I wanted to want to look away, but found that I really didn’t want to. Looking into his eyes was like looking into his soul. I was one of the few, if not the only one he allowed himself to be vulnerable around. He trusted me. That thought made me smile.

Dean’s gaze flickered downwards and his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed nervously, eyes fixed on my lower lip.

I wasn’t sure if he was aware of bending towards me, but suddenly, his hand landed on my bare knee. Goosebumps travelled up and down my body and I found myself squirming with pleasure.

He looked down at his hand as if he wasn’t sure who had put it there.

He started pulling away, but I was faster than him and placed my hand on top of his, stopping him, pulling it upwards on my leg the tiniest bit.

“Dani, this…” he muttered, staring at our hands on my bare leg. He didn’t seem to know how to continue the sentence, so I stopped him.

Putting the tray to the side, I scooched towards him so my knees touched his thigh, separated only by the soft fabric of his robe.

He looked me up and down as if seeing me for the very first time.

I didn’t bother hiding the smirk that formed on my face when I placed my hand on his thigh and, in a moment of pure bravery, slid the robe to the side.

The muscles in his jaw worked as if he wanted to say something. A million emotions played over his face; arousal, desire, shyness.

I didn’t wait for him to make up his mind and climbed on his lap, placing my legs left and right of him and my arms around his neck.

Dean cleared his throat and for a second I thought he would push me away. My heart was about to break, but instead of pushing, he put his arms around my waist and pulled me towards him.

I smelled his skin, the scent of sleep that still clung to him, almost drowned out by the stronger smell of cooking. Our chests almost touched.

His eyes found mine again, a pleading look in them begging permission for more, to continue what we’d started.

I really hoped I didn’t misinterpret his signs when I let my hands glide up his arms, his strong shoulders, his neck and… stopped. Double, triple checking, I swallowed, looking him in the eyes. His breathing had sped up, warm air from his mouth played over the skin between my clavicles.

It wasn’t too late to stop now. Did he want me to stop? Did I want to stop? Hell no! I sure didn’t! But what if he did? I was about to open my mouth to say as much, to offer him to stop this before things escalated.

This time it was him who took the next step. His hands landed at the back of my neck and he pulled me close so forcefully, I almost made him topple over backwards.

His lips were soft against mine, but now we were finally kissing, we were both so greedy, the softness didn’t last for long. The stubble of his beard scratched over my lips and our teeth clicked against each other. I didn’t care. I had wanted this for so long… spent so many sleepless nights thinking about that one kiss we’d shared so many months ago.

This was so much better. Nothing could have prepared me for what he tasted like, what his hands felt like on my body, how his erection pressed against me from below.

“You sure you want to do this?” he pressed out between kisses.

I pulled back the smallest bit to look him in the eyes. “Yea… don’t you?”

Instead of an answer he pulled me close and our lips met again. The breakfast tray on the bed clattered when he pushed me backwards so I was under him.

His lips were all over my face, kissing every part of me, down to my neck, gently biting the sensitive skin just above my pulse point. My small whimpers seemed to encourage him even more and he let his hands glide down my sides.

I had always marveled at how tall he was. I’d just never realized how big every single part of his body was. My hips would be sore tomorrow from the sheer broadness of him. There was nothing I could care less about. I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him closer, making him collapse on top of me. A gasp escaped my lips.

The hardness of his dick pressed against me, only separated by two very thin layers of cotton. Fuck I wanted him. I wanted him so bad.

His fingers shook as he let them slide under my clothes, up my sides, over my ribs… I was happy I hadn’t yet put on a bra. I didn’t want anything to be in his way.

The callouses on his hands scratching over my skin made goosebumps rise up my body. The knowledge of what those hands were capable of, the violence I’d seen them deal would probably make a sane person afraid. Good thing I’d been slowly going insane with desire ever since I’d met him.

All of the violence was forgotten in this moment anyways. He was gentle as if I was made of glass; almost too gentle for my taste.

His fingers found the underside of my breasts and my body involuntarily moved against him. I wanted his hands on every part of my body. All at the same time if possible. Arching my back against him, I closed my eyes. My nipples were rock hard by the time he found them.

Okay, this was going much too slow… I pushed him away and clumsily pulled my shirt over my head. I wished I had a camera to capture the expression on his face as he kneeled over me, his eyes sparkling with want, biting his own fist to stop himself from making any noise as he admired my body.

Nothing in my life could have prepared me for how beautiful his gaze made me feel. It didn’t last long enough and too long at the same time. He dove down towards me again and ravished my neck with kisses and bites, slowly but surely making his way downwards.

Both hands cupped my breasts and pushed them against his face as he kissed my sternum, then my left nipple, then my right. A whimper found its way from my throat and made him look up towards me, checking if I was okay.

“More!” I whispered, voice breathless. I squeezed him against me with my legs again and this time it was him who gasped. My fingers were icy cold against the hot skin of his belly as I pushed under his shirt. His robe had come undone a long time ago, but there was still too much fabric between us. Way too much.

He seemed to feel the same thankfully and got to his knees once more, shrugging off the robe and pulling his shirt over his head.

I whimpered at the sight of him. I had seen him without a shirt countless times, but this time was different. I saw him with new eyes. Horny eyes. His body was glorious. Strong, muscled, but soft all the same.

I struggled to turn us over and he got my drift. We rolled straight onto the breakfast tray, squishing the food under Dean’s back. We were too far gone to care.

He moved to shove the tray off the bed, and something broke with a clatter. The candle thankfully had gone out a while ago. I doubted we’d have cared enough to extinguish a fire at this point.

There was nothing but Dean and I.

I wanted his boxers off. I wanted my panties off. And then I wanted him inside of me for the rest of the day; for the rest of my life!

Thinking through the haze of hormones that filled my head, I didn’t find any reason why we shouldn’t do just that right this moment.

I got to my knees and started pulling down his boxers.

Dean looked at me and his eyes were almost black with the want filling them. Or maybe it just looked like that from my perspective. I didn’t care. Right now, there were much more important parts of his body to look at. Much bigger parts of his body.

He lifted his butt to let me slide his underwear off and I whimpered when I finally saw his perfect, throbbing erection. I didn’t manage to pull his boxers down any farther than his knees before I found myself bending over and licking the length of his shaft.

Dean hissed at the sensation and his hands dug into the sheets right and left of me. I made him spread his legs so I could kiss and lick my way up the soft inside of his thighs. His pubes were neatly trimmed and I wondered if he’d planned on his breakfast to go just like that. I wished he had informed me of his plan so I could have prepared as well.

I forgot all about my lack of forewarning when I glanced up at his face and saw the look of pure delight. I licked him again, stopping when I reached his head, the skin all silky soft, and reveled in his taste and smell. A small drop of precum glistened at the very tip and I licked it off before I wrapped my lips around him.

He gasped and a shiver went through his whole body as I took him in my mouth all the way.

His hands found my face and shoulders and he half sat up so he could reach my breasts, greedily cupping them while I worked on him, licking, sucking, kissing.

For a while, nothing but his moans and my gasps filled the room as I took him like I had imagined doing for so long, until he suddenly grabbed my head left and right and pulled my mouth off his dick.

“If you keep this up….” he panted, “I won’t be able to…” he caught his breath as I let a finger glide up over his leg. I didn’t need him to finish the sentence anyways. I climbed up over him, careful not to touch him any more. He wasn’t as young as he used to be. If I made him spend now, he’d probably take an hour until he could go again. And I didn’t want to wait that long.

Dean rolled us over so he was on top and hooked his fingers into the waistband of my panties while kissing me. I still had the taste of his dick in my mouth but he didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. We kissed just as deep and passionately as before, tasting each other, exploring, probably looking like teenagers the first time they ever kissed someone. There was nothing aesthetically pleasing about our kiss, just pure, unadulterated passion, pent up for much too long.

Next thing I knew, his fingers were at my entrance. “Fuck, you’re wet…” he whispered.

“I… that’s all your fault!” I defensively muttered, pulling his mouth back to mine.

He kissed me once more before he pulled away to move to other parts of me. Once again he found my clavicles and made his way down between my boobs, over my stomach. Same as him, I whimpered when he spread my legs. For a tenth of a second I was scared he wouldn’t find my nether regions visually appealing, but he didn’t even hesitate before he placed his lips on mine, making me buckle under him as he found my clit in a split second.

“Fuck…” I exhaled. He was good at this. Adding an indeterminable amount of fingers into the equation, it took him all of two minutes to make me cum for what would be the first of many times that day.

One hand still inside of me, his mouth on me, his other hand on my left breast, he didn’t even stop to allow me to catch my breath, just kept going right on, already driving me towards orgasm again. I grabbed for whatever I could reach, needing something to hold on to and dig my fingers into.

“Oh fucking h….” I panted, halfway to my second orgasm already.

Dean took a moment to look up at me. It made me look down at him. His lips and chin glistened with my juices, his eyes sparkled with joy and mischief.

“Why are you stopping?” I panted.

“As much as I love doing this, I need to breathe every once in a while,” he muttered, kissing the sensitive skin on my thigh. He pulled his fingers out of me and licked them while holding eye contact. The motion alone made me squirm.

“Dean… I need you inside of me! Please!” I begged, weakly reaching for any part of him I could find.

“Your wish is my command,” he said, getting into position again.

“No… your dick!” I stopped him. On another day, I could let him do this for hours, but today was not that day. I needed to feel him. All of him. Like God had intended for man and woman to do. It said a lot about my life during the last year how I was thinking of God right this moment.

“You sure?”

“What kind of a question is that? I want you inside of me! Don’t make me beg!” Alright, that had come out a lot angrier than I’d intended. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to….”

“Shh…” he made, and gave me a chaste kiss on my left nipple… chaste as far as kisses on the nipple could be described as chaste. “I take it as a compliment.”

“Yea, that was what I meant to make it sound like,” I agreed, thankful he wasn’t one to get mad easily.

He found his way back up to my mouth again and kissed me while lining himself up with my entrance.

I wanted to wrap my legs around him and pull him inside of me right this moment. I was desperate and he seemed to enjoy making me wait far too much if the grin on his face was any indication.

“Dean, please!” For the past year, I had dreamed about fucking him and I was only seconds away from getting what I wanted. I wasn’t beyond begging if that was what he was waiting for.

His tip against my oversensitive flesh made me want to go mad. He brushed up and down my lips a couple of times, slickening himself up and making me feel like I might implode if he didn’t enter me in the next second before he did just that, saving me from death by desire.

He entered me slowly, savoring every second and we moaned in unison.

He felt incredible inside of me. So right. Like my body had been made special for his. I wanted to hold on to him so he would never leave me again.

The last time I’d had sex had been some time ago, but I couldn’t remember ever feeling so intimately connected with anyone before.

We found a rhythm we both enjoyed and moved together. This was more than fucking. This was making love in all its glory.

My hands found his arms, his strong shoulders, holding on to him as if my life depended on it. I lost count of how many more times he made me cum. It seemed like after waiting for so long, a mere brush of his fingers over my clit, a touch of his dick against just the right spot was all it took to make me cum over and over.

There was no way to tell how much time had passed in reality, but inside my head, it felt like all of five seconds when he thrust into me once more and froze, cuming inside of me before collapsing on the bed with a shudder.

With one last, exhausted sigh I placed my right arm on his lower back. No one could expect me to move anything else after the beautiful, beautiful thing we’d just done. I felt like not only our bodies had merged, but our souls and our hearts as well. It had been perfect.

Dean placed a kiss on my shoulder and reached for the discarded blanket on the ground, pulling it over us before I closed my eyes, drifting off on the waves of endorphins and oxytocin flooding my brain.


	4. She gets a happy end

Twelve months had passed since that first time Dean and I had had sex. It was almost Christmas again. During the last year, I’d come to love Dean more than I’d ever thought possible.

We had had more sex than I cared to admit and everyone had gotten used to us sneaking away for a quickie at every possible chance. Sam had been annoyed at first but after walking in on us for the fifth time had announced he’d stopped caring.

I had decorated the bunker again, a bit more than last year. Everything smelled like Christmas. There were mistletoes placed in strategic places so Dean and I would have many occasions to kiss… not that we’d needed the excuse, but it made things all the more fun.

Sam and I were sitting in the kitchen, having breakfast when my phone vibrated. It was Dean.

Frowning, I opened the text message. He was in the next room, why did he text me instead of coming over?

I got up and made my way to our bedroom as he had requested.

“Dean?”

The room seemed to be empty when I opened the door.

“Are you alone?” Dean’s voice came from behind the door.

“Yea, like you wanted. What are you…” The words stuck in my throat as I looked behind the door. Dean was there, wearing a Santa hat and a pair of red, silky boxers with a line of fluff going around the waistband.

I snorted.

Dean pushed the door closed and grinned at me broadly, placing his hands on his hips. He seemed awfully proud of himself. I loved it, when he had that look on his face.

“What are you doing?” I laughed.

“Well, it’s our sexiversary, so I thought…” he trailed off. He seemed nervous all of a sudden.

“Dean?” I took a step towards him.

He cleared his throat and put his hands on both my shoulders. Moving me a little to the left, he told me to stay right there. A million emotions played over his face as they tended to do when something made him nervous or uncomfortable… not that that happened a lot. What was he on about?

I looked up and smiled, when I found a small twig of mistletoe hanging from the ceiling. It wasn’t one of the ones I had hung. When I looked down at him again, he had gotten down on one knee before me.

My mouth dropped open. Was he doing what I thought he was doing? Was this really happening? A million thoughts flashed through my head, none of them making any sense.

“It’s our sexiversary,” he said again, “so I thought, I’d ask if you wanted to take the next step with me…” He pulled a small box from god knew where.

Tears filled my eyes and I had to get down on the ground with him as my knees grew too weak to carry my weight.

“What are you doing? That… you’re supposed to stand!” he protested.

I put my hand on his face to shut him up and took the box from his hand. A delicate ring with a small inset diamond sparkled out at me. Was this really really happening?

“So?” Dean said, taking the box back and taking out the ring.

“Yes! Yes of course!” I exclaimed, giving him my hand so he could put the ring on my finger. “This is…. I love you so much! This is perfect!” I hugged him so hard, he almost toppled over backwards.

“I love you too,” Dean whispered, catching himself. “I love you too…”


End file.
